Negotiation has timing. It has past, present and future. Managing the timing builds trust. Not being able to manage time leads to fear; fear leads to anxiety and reduces time and possibilities: when you feel anxious you instinctively begin to rush. It is better to go slowly, quietly, and not show fear through anxiety. You must be humble and patient in order to tolerate uncertainty and always make the other party get involved in the negotiation.
The date of the agreement is more flexible than a deadline because of the fear the latter may bring. If it is arbitrarily imposed, it can be modified in the same way. It is more important to assess losses and profits than to comply blindly with defined dates.
Negotiations take time as they imply commitment, but that process can be slow so it is best to start as soon as possible. You must leave your personal ideal in order to understand the world of others and extract their attitudes, value systems, and frame of reference. Besides, you must show the other person that you understand where they come from; you must meet them where they are. Identification with others is the empathetic way. Empathy optimizes the power of negotiation, getting the best from the other, giving more than they receive, enjoying giving and seemingly building their success. Competitive strategy is “I win, you lose”, and collaborative, on the other hand, is “everyone can win”, without ignoring the other’s gains and needs in order to satisfy our own needs.
The global timing view allows correct planning that will guarantee the anticipation and the negotiation efficiency. Not being prepared causes us to rush and does not distinguish whether the proposals are fair or not. You need to spend and invest time in negotiation in order to achieve engagement with the other to facilitate the agreement. The time invested is proportional to the worth of the goal and the knowledge we have about what is negotiated. You must not negotiate something as if it were important when it is not.
If you are not a specialist in negotiating, it is better to not invest a lot of time, it is a good idea to give up, or look for a specialist’s help. If you do not know what to do, do not do anything.
The power of persistence pays dividends; do not release the pressure until the agreement is reached. The most powerful negotiator is the one that can insist the most. If you repeat something peacefully several times, the other party will adopt the concept easily even if it takes time to get used to. Each one tends to believe that their worldview is the only possible one.
In negotiation we conquer the long-term project by resigning short-term things. The one who wins does it because they have more money, more time or a combination of both.